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Tuesday, 30 August 2011

I may skin Beloved


So today was bank holiday and while I don't normally get these off, I managed to wrangle merely being on call. I intended to be productive but kinda flopped.

I also intended to do a full on cook fest but after baking I just felt too lazy today. Lazy day is good. So went all light and summery – crab risotto, home made onion bread, tarragon butter mushrooms and some rotisserie chicken left in the fridge – a con meal because it's relatively quick to do but looks like you put in so much effort :)

Except, when Beloved is there. Beloved should be banned from all kitchens

I make dough – he takes my baking bowl. I grab it to make more, and he's put away the flour. I get it out again and he's put the butter away. I had to get the yeast out 7 times. SEVEN!


Sparky: Where's my wooden spoon?

Beloved: In the dishwasher

Sparky: *retrieves* leave. It. Alone. *starts kneading breadcakes* Where's my spoon?

Beloved: Errr... dishwasher. You were kneading, I didn't think you needed it any more!

Sparky: *retrieves and starts mixing risotto. Puts down and stirs stock* WHERE IS MY SPOON!?

Beloved: Well... I'm helping

Sparky: *flours surface for rolling, look for rolling pin*

Beloved: *wipes up flour and puts flour away*

Sparky: OUT! OUT OF MY KITCHEN!

He hovers like a vulture to “help” put things away. While I'm cooking. I tell you it's a miracle I didn't cause him severe bodily harm. I may actually skin him then sell his skin.

And y'know, when he EMPTIES the dishwasher he will complain about how many pots I've used. Why? Because when I can't find a bowl/spoon/fork/tray I will get a new one out – which he will again steal. Definitely selling his skin. How much can I get for it?