Wednesday, 1 February 2012

So... car!

After deciding I needed a new car last week, but at the same time working so much that I had no time to shop for one, Beloved officially lost patience. Here was a perfect opportunity for shiny shopping and I WASN'T DOING IT and this is just WRONG and do I not know he is waiting here, with money, ready to buy a ridiciulously expensive thing and I was STOPPING him?! There were, no doubt, a hundred salesmen out there ready to tell him about shiny extras he can "upgrade" into which he simply has to do and I wasn't letting him.

Clearly, this level of resistance could only be maintained so long

So when I got him today (at 9:30, most annoyingly) Beloved greeted me with "I bought you a car."
U-huh. I checked, but no, I wasn't hallucinating and Beloved did not take the opportunity to pretend it was a good joke and run and get the money back before I realised he was serious.

So I, of course, tried to murder him. As I am a reasonable fellow. But he insisted I see the car first. I was discinlined to agree since I do so dislike delaying bloody murder, but I realised we were in the living room that had just been decorated and, really, murdering him on the concrete drive would be much much easier to clean up - so I acquiesed and went to look at the car.

Which is apparently a Vauxhall Insignia 2.0 CD TI SRI NAV. And it's black. Metallic black. With a black leather interior. And it looks absolutely gorgeous *ahem* moderately acceptable.

I pointed out that I was still going to murder him because no matter how pretty the car was, he was way out of line to buy the car without my being there. No, even if it was a diesel did get 67 mpg. And no, even if it does have hundreds of shiny buttons. And is climate controlled. And already has all my music loaded into its MP3 player. And I won't be swayed by parking sensors, built in sat navs, a radio more powerful than my stereo. And really, I don't need toggleable traction control or cruise control. Or all those many little lights and buttons.

He was still wrong to buy it. Yes yes he was. Very wrong

Ok, we can keep the car.

But I still may murder him.