Now I have many things to do this week, so it would be a bad idea to buy this game. A very bad idea, I’ll end up playing it and neglecting my huge to-do list, Beloved, the house, eating, sleeping and possibly breathing to play this game. I don’t have time for that at the moment, so I will be sensible and not buy it.
No, no I won’t.
NO. I will NOT.
Brain: buy it buy it buy it buy it buy it buy it buy it buy it
Sparky: NO! I have things to do!
Brain: More important than Mass Effect 3?
Sparky: Yes! I have work, we have to eat, the house needs cleaning.
Brain: That’s what sick days are for. And take away. And since when did a little dirt hurt anyone?
Sparky: I have stuff to write!
Brain: Mass Effect 3 will inspire you to write more. Inspiration! Energy! Enthusiasm. You can’t NOT buy this game
Sparky: Since when?
Brain: So say the rules I just made up. If I repeat them they’ll make sense.
Sparky: No, I’m not buying it.
Brain: Fine… oh, is this a credit card? Why, yes yes it is
Sparky: I’m moving it out of eye-line. There, temptation removed.
Brain: ok… but googling and checking the site wouldn’t hurt right? See, doesn’t it look shiny
Sparky: No! I’m closing the window! NOT LOOKING! No, look, it’ll be cheaper on Steam eventually
Brain: You want to WAIT!? BLASPHEMER! You can afford it. And if you can’t, Beloved has 2 kidneys!
Sparky: I’m not killing him for a computer game
Brain: He has 2! He has a spare!
Sparky: No. Common Sense Brain, control temptation Brain!
Common Sense Brain: You’re going to buy it anyway. Every second you delay it is a second you spend obsessing over it rather than doing something productive. The sooner you download it, the sooner you complete it, the sooner it stops controlling your life
Sparky: this… makes sense
Actual Common Sense Brain: No it doesn’t! You’re rationalising your temptation and calling it common sense!!!
Sparky: Hush you! Fake Common Sense tells me I must buy this now!
I am weak...