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Friday, 11 May 2012

Beloved, Badness and Baking



Beloved’s work place has started giving him grey hairs (which is normally what my job does) but with all the marriage equality in the news, he’s treated to daily debates on whether or not “the gays” need marriage/want marriage which is apparently raging fiercely across the work place. He’s the only gay person in the place and his work mates are oh-so-surprised that his extremely patient and affable nature has snapped and he is dragging arses on the carpet for presuming to know what “the gays” want and why, in the name of all that is sensible, do they even give a damn one way or the other since it doesn’t concern them.

His colleagues don’t understand why he’s getting ever more pissed off at them. Because it’s fun to have a bunch of straight folks judge the merits and worthiness of your relationship, right? Let alone getting to enjoy it every damn day.

In general, I think my Beloved is approaching a burn out similar to the ones I have regularly (albeit more stably because, well, Beloved’s brain isn’t full of the badness). His work place has less of the splodey issues as mine and he’s never had the closeness with his family to make them sporky nor has he had a past on the level of mine – but his work place is hardly friendly, his family not exactly warm and his past hardly rosy. He also has a wider circle of friends that, frankly, I would have cut loose (or cut into teeny tiny pieces) long since, one of the barriers to us going out more is any circle of his friends is going to include some friends or acquaintances that will make us both want to slap them before the night is out.

Besides, even if all of these were super shiny, it’s just impossible to duck all of the shit that’s out there. Yes, inset my bitter rant at how much living in a straight world is unpleasant on so many levels. I think it drags us all down now and then. I think Beloved has been brewing this one up for a while – it certainly explains him deciding, after years of being a fan to dump his anime (though I’ve moved it into storage in case he wants to come back to it) with a rant about how he’s sick to the back teeth of dodging round any gay representation because of the trainwrecks.

I’m hoping to batten down the hatches, have a straight-free home for a little while, keep the TV off and engage in some quality hermitting. Quality alone time together to rebuild and recharge. Especially if I can poke him to take some days off away from the “hey, are gay folk really human” debates.

And I’m cooking and baking up a storm – yes good food doesn’t cure everything but at least you can be upset and hurt with bacon, chocolate and lots of cake and stuff that is very not good for you.  Actually toasted things seem to be the favour of the day – so teacakes, muffins, crumpets, pikelets and bagels ahoy! I need to stock more yeast.